I may have empty cabinets at home. But I may still leave grocery stores empty-handed muttering something about “prices are too high,” etc. It’s not a lack of money, but rather my stubbornness to pay more than 10 cents an ounce for anything.
After starving myself, I finally found what I thought was a solution: Go to the store hungry.
It worked! I would find myself leaving with $20 or more worth of food. My stomach would thank me. Sometimes, like a starving raccoon, I’d even dive into a bag or Oreos on my way home.
But “Oreos” is among the key words for my new problem. When I go to the store hungry, I end up buying garbage. Cookies. Frozen pizza. Cheez-Its.
I need to learn to cook real food. But I’m always too hungry to figure it out. If it takes more than 2 steps, or if I can’t pull it out of a microwave or oven in less than 15 minutes, I’m probably not going to eat it.
If I keep eating this way, I’ll probably die sometime within the next couple of years. At least all the food preservatives will cut back on embalming expenses.