It was brought to my attention that Surge soda is back, on this third episode for 2014.
That’s good news. I have been looking for a way to get a bit of a 3 P.M. buzz without resorting to becoming one of those hilly-billy morons with his compensation-sized pickups who drinks Monsters all day and all night, and even has the green Monster “M” stuck as a window cling to his pickup’s rear window.
The trouble is, my supply of late-90s soft drinks has finally run low. And Amazon wants a ridiculous price for the new, second-run cans:
Certainly not me. But a buddy of mine, who paints cars without any environmental (or business) permits, told me he picked up a case of four Surge cans for only four bucks. And I was all like, “Dude! You gotta tell me where you’re gettin’ those, man! Amazon wants, like, ninety bucks more than that.”
And he was all like, “Es una mala imitación. Yo nunca compro en El Súper porque venden productos de calidad inferior.”
I don’t speak Spanish, but I did hear, El Super, so …
Also on this episode:
- We get a call from Sean Connery’s brother*, who pleads for help from the YTMND and Radio Citrus communities. Can we help him through his post-election funk, when we ourselves are so horribly incapable of doing anything (let alone influencing international politics)?
- Jerry Seinfeld* calls in to have an argument with George about personal pizzas versus public pizzas.
- We call Uncle Luke to discuss race relations in the United States. He points out a dangerous source of immigrants that get no attention in the mainstream media, but pose a threat to Major League Baseball and the American way of life.
- My scientific friend (think of him as our “Unidan,” only with less permabanning) explains the whole “on again, off again” relationship astronomers are having with Pluto.
- Prove me wrong: I am/was a huge YTMND-er and I still don’t have a girlfriend. Therefore, by the transitive property, no YTMND-er could ever possibly have a girlfriend.
- A very disturbing call from Texas that ends up sliding sideways into quoting Robin Williams films. Perhaps “disturbing” is the wrong word. It’s sort of like a Helen Keller joke that bombs badly.
- And I’m totally stoked for the new “Fish Eye Lens” song which came out this past week!
* Celebrity voices awesomely imitated